Buta Tarikh

Last Saturday, I watched a DVD I borrowed from Sherie. The movie title is “Must Love Dogs”. John Cusack and Diane Lane starred. It is basically about a woman who got divorced for 8 months and having a hard time getting over it. She have a big family, I think she have like 2 sisters and 2 brothers and a dad who were all trying to fix her up with a man and get over her divorce. But somehow she just finds it’s hard to actually be part of the dating game again after years of marriage. With her sisters’ help, she actually answered “the lonely hearts” ads and end up answering her own dad’s ads. Her sisters, not giving up, actually created an account in the internet for her and that’s where all the excitement begins.

While I was watching this movie, I was thinking and counting how many times I had actually gone out on blind dates set up by family and friends. And of course, dates set up by myself with the chat friends in the countless chat rooms and also partner matching love looking sites on the net. I guess it is easier now for us than our moms or dads before us to find a date. We have a wider range of choices and also the technologies advancement have helped us a lot in finding that one true love…but that one I leave for discussion another time cos rite now, it is about blind dates…haahahaha…

I don’t think I am the only who have experience of being set up for blind dates, mostly by my dear close friends. I mean, I know that they have my best interest in their heart but usually...well most of the time, I would find that their “interest” are not that interesting or not interested in me. They just don’t want me to be alone especially when attending dinner parties, weddings, get together, etc…basically they don’t want me to say no to every invitations just because I don’t have anyone to go with. Some of my friends even set me up because they just want to know my sexual preferences (and for the last time Kak Dayang, I am not gay. Don’t worry ok). And of course, they just don’t want me to be in the bujang lapuk statistics…….

Like I said, I had experienced being set up for dates by family and friends. Some I choose to cherish some I choose to erase it out from my memories. The moment u heard one of ur aunties or friends said “I have someone I want to introduce to you. I think she is just perfect for you”….a big “Oh No!” suddenly appears in ur head. And they would continue…” she is smart, polite, nice young lady. U should try and meet her. This is her number or if you want, I can arrange something for you, maybe a small gathering so u guys can meet up. Ok? U can thank me later. Trust me, u r gonna love her”……and for the record, I have not thanked anyone yet…..it is not like I don’t appreciate what they do but man….blind dates are hard

I like to categorize my blind dates into 3. The first one would be FFD (Family Friend’s Daughter). I would hear this girl’s name almost everyday for almost a week. “ Anak Mak Cik Midah kau tu, Nurul, baru je graduate and balik kat sini. Mak ingat nak invite them for dinner. U have plans tak this weekend?” my mom would say. I know what she is doing but would u say “I have plans. I want to go out and meet my friends and watch some football”…just to get away but u know no matter how u want to avoid it; u MUST meet anak Mak Cik Midah. Usually dates like this have the criteria below:

a) Daughter of a family friend
b) Usually wears tudung
c) Just graduated
d) Usually about 5-6 years younger
e) Close friends when we are kids
f) Introduce again during Hari Raya or some family gathering i.e. cousin’s wedding, doa selamat
g) Mom will call me to her room and ask me to meet the girl.


The second category I think I called it FWC (Friends’ Who Care) category. The usual introduction to this would be “I have a colleague, Milah is her name. She is such a sweet young girl. Smart and have a good sense of humor too. I just can’t believe it when she told me that she is single. I mean being pretty and all. I don’t know why, but I just think she is perfect for you. You are gonna love her.” And on and on and on…..by the end of the day I would have the girl’s number and at nite I would receive an sms reminding me to call MILAH…..which u obediently obliged. The criterias are:

a) Friend’s colleague or x-school or uni mate
b) Hair usually coloured
c) Working
d) Usually the same age
e) Never met her but she is suppose to be perfect for me
f) By word of mouth or at a party or some gathering
g) Friend will call or sms your phone before the date, during the date and after the date

The last category I would like to call WWW (World Wide Web). Yups, from the internet. Chat rooms and countless friendship or relationship website that connects you to people u would never meet. People all around the world, across the ocean, across the nation……the wonderful world of internet and technologies. This one is obviously by ur own hard work..it is u know...trying to make ur profile or u nick name (abg_misai_single, nani_lonely_gal, etc) sounds good and of cos to get some attention. The usual introduction usually a/s/l (chat rooms) or “Hi! Just wanted to drop by and say hi.” (message to ur account). The criterias would be:

a) Don’t know
b) Depends on the avatar or when the pix was taken
c) Working maybe, though the occupation column does sounds a bit strange ( Dreamer/ Dapur Officer)
d) Ermm….one day it is 18 but maybe tomorrow it can be 25, depending on who she talk to
e) I just hope the one in the pix is her cos damn she is hot
f) Depends on how frequent are u on the net and surf through
g) u keep it a secret


I guess most of my friends would have a similar list. Being a 30 year old man and always alone, i had my fair share of blind dates. I didn't come up with the categories and criterias above from just 3 blind dates...i think for the past 2 years, i had almost 2 blind dates set up in a month by friends, family and urs truly from the net. I certainly don't want to be alone and at one point, well, earlier this year, i actually was contemplating of asking my mom to look for a wife. I was tired of all the dating process, the getting to know part, etc....i just want to just forget about it....well...that was the plan

I have been through a lot of dating process, blind dates or whatever dates u can think of, but I guess the main thing is meeting the right person, at the right time and also with the right intention. It doesn’t matter who set u up or where u meet, the main thing is when the right person comes, u just know it. I found mine, just when i thought i would end up alone.

Put too much expetaction, u might be dissapointed. Accept what comes your way and love it for what it is, not what u expect and want it to be.....

p/s: before i terlupa...Cher scored 5 goals in last nite game, and sadly 3 goals were scored when i was the goalie....wa wa wa....